The Ultra Super Friends League of Justice
Much like how sports teams have their second-string players, super hero leagues also have their second-string players. And much like how sports leagues have minor leagues, super hero leagues also have minor leagues. And much like how sports teams have fat kids who immitate them in their backyard, .....well, anyway, The Ultra Super Friends League of Justice!The Team
- Johnny Nightvision
- The Chef
- Madame Cougar
- Wiz Kid
- Captain Sarcasm
- Hind Sight
- 2 ¢
| Name and Alias | Super Power | Weakness | Origin | Catchphrase | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| John Ambersam | Johnny Nightvision | The ability to see clearly at night | The loss of his night-vision goggles | John Ambersam was just a normal 43 year old jobless man living with his mother. One fateful day, however, as he was eating his Sugar-Explodey-O's, he saw an advertisement for Sargent Armyman's Bonafide Night Vision Goggles (tm), for the low, low, low price of 6 payments of $36.44. He immediately began siphoning away his mother's medications to sell to middle schoolers to raise the money. With the night vision goggles in hand, he became Johnny Nightvision the intrepid warrior of the night! | "The night is my might!" |
| Miguel Rodrigez | The Chef | Cooking microwave dinners extremely well. | Not having a microwave or a frozen dinner handy | Miguel Rodrigez was born with a gift. A gift to make the best damn microwave-ready meals the world had ever known. He knew, however, that with great power comes great responsibility, and he vowed to use his powers to make the world a safer place to live. | "Five minutes on "high" should do for you!" |
| Beth McGowan | Madame Cougar | The ability to seduce men at least 20 years younger than herself. | Women and men over the age of 25 | Beth McGowan was a happily married woman, until a tragic cougar ravaged her family, killing her husband and her 3 young children. She too, was terribly savaged by the beast, but with highly experimental medical technology her husband had been developing, as well as a healthy does of Celtic magic, remade her as Madame Cougar, the sexy mistress of justice! | "I have so much to teach you!" |
| Matthew Bernicky | Wiz Kid | Hacker | Being grounded, doing homework, or being at school. Also, shellfish, peanutbutter, girls, and direct confrontation. | Matthew "Wiz Kid" Bernicky is only 13, but he is a high class hacker, slicing through the most complex store-bought anti-virus programs with only mild difficulty, over the span of several days. He is the USFLOJ's "behind the scenes" guy, providing them intelligence and his hacking abilities, when he is not in school or doing his homework, or after 9, because that's his bedtime. | "5 more minutes mom!" |
| Joney Millcifent | Captain Sarcasm | Really hurtful comments | Self-confidence and physical force | If words could cut like swords, Joney would be a swordmaster. Dark and brooding, he is an impeccable example of teen angst personified in scathing sarcasm. He is 2 ¢'s older brother, and his mom insists that he "play hero" with her. | "Whatever." |
| Rames Down | Hind Sight | Knowing exactly what the team should have done in any given situation. | Things that haven't happened yet, or are happening currently | Rames Down is possibly Jonesy's only friend. Early on in life, he discovered he had a knack for knowing what he and Jonesy should have done to avoid trouble after they had already gotten caught. In hindsight, this superhero league is probably a terrible idea. | "My hindsight is 20/20!" |
| Kylee Millcifent | 2 ¢ | The ability to chime in cutely on any conversation | Being a 5 year old girl | Kylee is 5. She likes pink. She's adorable. She also has to give her opinion on everything, even if she has no idea what the topic is. She thought being a superhero would be a lot of fun. Plus it pissed off her brother. | "Well I think that-!" |
Click here to learn about the USFLOJ's arch-nemisis.
No comments:
Post a Comment